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TEAMSELECTA UPDATE - End of February 2004

With just over 2 months to go, who's in the running for the title?

Click on the links below for the latest standings in the Teamselecta Competition.

Thanks again to Mike Grant for his summary!


TEAM SELECTA FEBRUARY 2004

This Month has produced the closest ever finish in the race for the coveted title of “Manager of the Month”.

In fourth place with 99 points, a truly lionhearted effort from Steve Ovenden!

Only two points ahead with 101 points is Will Robinson.

And tying on 103 points are Jon Fisher and Jerry Farmer.

To separate them, we look at the goals for column and Jon has 87, but our winner with 88, by just one goal, is Jerry Farmer.

Hard luck there Jon, a great effort, but it’s Jerry who receives this month’s award of the 10 voucher to spend in the club shop.

And Jerry is topping the table with 639 points as well, that’s a lead of 17 points over Phil Raddall1 and Will Robinson, who are sharing second spot with 622 points.

They are closely followed one point behind by Steve Hawkins, who appears to have taken time out from his busy schedule of writing books about time and the universe to enter the Team Selecta competition.

Now for the poor unfortunate wretches who are inhabiting the lower reaches of the league, and there are two big surprises this month.

Surprise number one is that Saul Richman is not one of the three worst performers this month!

That dubious dishonour lies with firstly, third bottom place Dot Brown with a meagre 44 points and continues the time honoured Team Selecta tradition that sex is not prerequisite to appalling performance. (No double entendre intended!)
Second bottom with an even more meagre 43 points is Nigel Atkinson.

And in bottom place this month with only 41 points is K. Stanford (more on this unlucky individual later)

So the bottom three in the table are now as follows:
In third bottom spot with 462 points, and maintaining the tradition referred to above, is the consistently awful Gillian Young.
In second bottom spot, and also the second big surprise, it’s Saul Richman!

You may remember that Saul has occupied bottom spot since Noah built his ark, and was explained by the fact that he is a Manchester United supporter.

But this month, and totally out of character, he amassed a pretty average 66 points and that increased his points total to 452 and lifted him off bottom spot.

We were so surprised by this that we sent the inspectors round to take a drug sample, but he had gone out and had switched off his mobile!!
His excuse that he had gone furniture shopping to Ikea and had borrowed Rio Ferdinand’s battery was not acceptable and he hasn’t heard the last of this.

So, that means we have a new bottom of the heap, and it’s none other than K. Stanford, who, with 433 points has opened up a 19 point gap at the bottom.

To quote the last lines of the January newsletter:
“Finally, a word to our atrocious performer of this month, K. Stanford.
Saul has 386 points.
You are only six points ahead of him.
Can you imagine what is going to be written about you if you slip below him?”

Well, K. Stanford, you’ve cunningly disguised whether you’re a man or a woman, so you could be Ken or you could be Karen (or perhaps just Karen at weekends?) but irrespective of that the fact remains that you’ve now been the most atrocious performer over the past two months and you’re making a Manchester United supporter look intelligent.

You just can’t sink lower than that, and I just don’t know how you’re going to have the nerve to show your face at Bootham Crescent again!

 
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